With all the gear bought, I was feeling like a big poser and really no better prepared for the race. In fact, a sort of dread was filling my nights with wierd race related dreams; dreams of drowning, or gear malfunction, of bike crashes and missing teeth...
Team Pussywillows started naming fears over emails. When we biked to the tavern we stated them and promised to leave them behind at that bar. I didn't even know what was truely behind my fears until we started talking about it. Then it boiled down to this: I needed to let go of my competetive self and focus on just learning about this sport and finishing the race. I needed to make peace with the idea that I would not be the winner, nor should I even be trying to win this race. Sounds silly right? I have never ran a race and haven't trained for the race. Why would I even be considering it. But, in that bar I realized the second TRI - LESSON: The second thing you need to relinquish to be a triathlete is your internal gremlins. You know, the ones that speak to you in your head saying things like you're not good enough, you're too old, you must win if you are going to try, etc.
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